I'm going to run through the doors of my high school, I'm gonna scream at the top of my lungs.

There's so many more pictures with me that I can't upload because of the super computer. Which I have to say is one of the most annoying technological equipment I ever had to deal with.

Even if you're here. Even if you're not. You guys mean the world to me.

Jaycee

Jasmine

Faris

Lawrence

Peter

Farah

Carmen

Arya

Pang

Jia Lun

Rah rah

Yu Hui

Nasri

Wai Hoe

Kok Weng

Azalea

Naddy

Wei Shen

Alex

Teck Tsen

Ryan

Eleena

Tas

Deedee

Ms Anjali

Ms Hoo

Ms Ann

Ms Ann Marie

Cikgu Norul

Mr Zac

Mr Gandi

Mr Rama

Mr Sugu

Mr Surish

Mr Hafiz

Mr Munis

Mr Siva

Mr Ihsan

You guys are all super amazing people. Teehee.

I love you.

When I was 12, I had this amazing vision of what high school life was going to be like. But it wa all blank, empty spaces. I used to imagine being the 'it' girl and having tons of friends and people who fall over their own feet to get to me. (which obviously didn't happen.) I dreamt a lot of what going through from being the oldest in your old school, to a minority in your new high school like would feel like.

I didn't know it would feel this beautiful :)

Thank you so much for completing the puzzle of my 12 year old mind about the past 5 years of my life. I wouldn't want them any other way.

:)

Looooooocas.

So today is officially the first day I heard my brother's voice in let's say, a month? It's been a month and 4 days (mum has been keeping count), and I don't think I was thinking much of him because of my hectic schedule with school activites and dance.

But thanks to Jon's awesome parents (Uncle TS and Auntie Susan ♥), I managed to catch him for about 30 minutes, listening to him talk about the super cool friends, and going to play basketball soon (WOAH, THAT'S A FIRST). And how he furnished his room, and loves his roommate. Teeeeheeeeeeee.

It's awesome that he's settled in. The parents can stop worrying about now haha.

*

I had about 8 hours of dance today, 5 hours the day before, and I'm going to continue with another 7 tomorrow. Pretty crazy if you ask me. That's 20 hours in total, for 3 days. Gah. How am I going to live.

Today officially marks the last month before SPM.

30 DAYS.

Uh oh. Is all.

Emptee.

For those of you who don't know Emptee, it's about time I open your eyes to a whole new different world of graphic teeshirts. This is for those people who keep staring at other people with cool shirts and ridonkulous captions, and want to rip it off them and keep it for themselves.

It's to satisfy your window shopping needs. But if you want to get them so badly, why not ;))

Red Moses on a jacket.

The secret to the head men use to think with.

Drumera.

So that's the secret.

CLICK CLICK CLICK.

And support the masterminds behind the Emptees.

Falling asleep to the sound of sirens.

'We could make something happen, something incredibly beautiful, savagely intense, terrifyingly amazing. Or, we could keep it a secret. And then, we, or however wonderful we would come to be, would become undone, would fade away, and disappear into oblivion.'

Important annoucement tayme.

Hello there girls and boys. Today, I would like to talk about how my life sucks. I have people I don't know, hating me about things I love to do. I have not finished studying Moral. I have to wake up in 7 hours. I don't know what I'm going to do for the 2 1/2 hours I sit in the exams, which I would obviously fail. Apparently I bring everyone down.

But then there's the shiny, beautiful part of life. Which makes you wanna watch love movies and cry all night. Or, cuddle up with a bunny you've had since forever and talk to it about how shitty your life is.

Friends. ♥

*click to enlarge

Taking this heart you broke in two.

I miss my guitar, and I miss dancing. So, so, so badly.

Don't get me wrong, I love musicals. And I love watching the aftermath of my brainstorming and the choreography I come up with. But it's so vastly different from the style I'm accustomed to.

Trials today was a complete mess. I couldn't write up to 1000 words for the BM Karangan, and I could hardly keep my eyes open. My legs almost froze to Popsicles even under the kurung skirt. I don't know how I'm going to survive tomorrow.

Sejarah is a foreign language. I kept falling asleep halfway through the paper. Thank god I have english tomorrow. That, I can do with easeeeee.

Anyway, I'd have the time to blog on wednesday about the past whole senior year, and how it's ending in two weeks time. Which sucks as hell. But at the same time I'm dying to leave. There's so many things that's making my mind distressed.

Now, to cram my head between my Sejarah books. Hopefully I can take a photograph with this oh-so-useful brain of mine, either that or just be crazy enough to get all the answers right tomorrow.

Marriage.

So, I'm finally married. I was waiting for the day all my life. (5 minutes, trust me.)

We had a beautiful wedding, really. Just the computer, connecting us in ways that we didn't deem possible. We exchanged Cheezel wedding rings (Jon ate them all), and I was supposed to get onion rings for all my piercings but Jon ate those to.

Hopefully he doesn't intend to eat all jewellery he wants to give me. I was thinking a necklace string of gummy bears? Or a bracelet made of M&Ms.

Okay, husband, my J.Co, are you happy now.

You wasted 10 minutes of my life talking about how we got married through technology. People should learn from us. The new generation of wedlock. We so fly, bebeh. (Y)

Don't ask me if we're for real or not.

If you say we're not, you're probably insulting the entire relationship, and the both of us. Either that or you can't take us seriously.

Then again, if you believe it, you might be taking us too seriously. After all we're a couple. Of jokers.

Then again, if you don't, you'd feel like an idiot trying to deny it in front of us, when we both clearly know we love each other.

Then again, we are hard to predict.

Then again, being full of surprises, we're probably the last thing you'd believe us to be, or the first.

Hee. Mindfuck (Y)

Good luck in your SATs. Remember when you SAT on a CAT, it fArTed, which is why you shouldn't be SATing. But it's okay. American degrees are cool.

Too much is never enough.

I miss you guys so much :/

So I've decided the blog needed a redo, and I spent ages trying to find a sexy background picture. Now that that's all settled, we'll move on to less boring, trivial things.

SPM is less than 50 days away.

Which at the moment scares the shit out of me. I'm waiting for the stress, and the overwhelming need to put on a pair of glasses and bury my head in my books to come, but it's not coming. Which probably means that my brains have gone bonkers. I mean, in all honesty, I expected myself to freak out, and anticipated a great change in my studies. But so far, nothing.

The amount of shit being pilled onto my back at this point of time is alarming. I'm surprised I didn't just roll over and break my spine in half. I couldn't even fit my driving lessons in between my schedule. I need some space, some quiet space in the middle of nowhere (with plenty of internet, though), to just think thoughts that don't need to be thought of to think. If you geddit.

I honestly can't wait to enter the next phase of my life where I get to live like how I want to. I hope my parents feel that they should invest in me going to the UK to do my IB. I don't think I can stand another hot day in Malaysia. Or another one of those days where I stay in the house and do nothing.

I can't wait to work on my dance again, finally. Ballet's amazing and all, but nothing beats dancing on your own. And with the new iTouch dad got me, it's only going to make everything easier. I love my songs, I love how I can listen to them fullblast at any given moment. I love how I'm connected to the internet wherever I go (mostly?).

Questionable time of buying it, though. Next week is trials. And I haven't even gotten started on my studying. Life is just the shittiest mess you've ever been in, isn't it. Well, my ballet teacher found out about me choreographing the musical, which, haha, made her interested in coming to watch. Whoopie. The loaded stress on me, after taking ballet from her for the past 11 years. But I think she'd like it, I hope she does. Hee.

Completely lazy to rant about the whirldwind of emotional crap I've been through lately. There's just not enough happiness to cover it all up. Tralala.

For those of you who have missed out on the epic penis...

*click to enlarge

Just to cheer you up on your terrible days. Like the one I'm having today. I'm probably going to end up extremely bitter after this episode. No more charity shit for people who don't need it. From today on, everything I do for people comes with a price. I'm not going to be that wimpy little push over like everyone assumes me to be.

Have a jolly effing good day, everyone.

College dilemmas. Putting the world on a hold.

I found a college I really want to go to. UWC Atlantic, in the UK. It's a castle, and Harry Potty was gonna shoot there but they had classes going on so it got called off. It's huge, it's beautiful, it's amazing, it's far from home. I know I sound like a brat, but it's such an amazing opportunity how can you not reach out and grab it? On the plus plus plus side, I found a friend of mine who is currently attending this palace, so I'm gonna know more about it than ever. And I hope I get to go.

But the fees just blew my parents head off. Lucas's school fees are nadda, zero. Which is probably why dumping $45000 pounds on their laps wasn't such a good idea. But Costa Rica, Italy and Norway all sound like amazing places to go to, innit?

Anyway with reality done, I'm going to start accounting my fantasies.

I'm planning to take an eight month gap to work on my dance and earn a couple bucks just for kicks. Gonna try out working under Mr. Zac's new Musicast. The crew's opening up a studio soon so I'm gonna try that out too. Maybe get myself into a more artsy fartsy mood so I can gear up for going overseas.

Then, I'd pack my wand, my maroon cape, take my owl's cage, wear the striped red and yellow tie. Get frizzy orange hair, and a brain. Change my name to Hermoine, and join Harry Potty and Ron Weasle in my Hogwarts in the UK in September.

Hells, yeah (Y).